School Report Card Strugglers Gifts

'But I don't need qualifications, daddy - I'm going to be a dumb blonde when I grow up!'

''C-minus'? ??" Do you know how long it took me to find and download this term paper?'

"I'd rather eat your homework."

'If history keeps repeating itself, why do I have to repeat this class?'

'The bad news is you failed all your courses. The good news is you passed the urine test.'

'Can you debunk my essay?'

Parent Involvement Tip #1

"Homework! Homework! Homework! I'll be doing this for hours! Talk about a misspent youth."

"I'm terrible taking tests, too. I always freeze."

"Don't pull any wisdom teeth. I need all the help I can get in school."

"I'm doing just fine ??" as long as no one decides to do a background check."

'Math isn't really my long suit, Mrs. Ferguson -- how about I just take a drug test?'

"When I hear the word mathematics I immediately think of three things. Boring and useless."

Gone for Broke College

'I wish I could fast forward today...'

Back to school anchor

'I don't want to make you feel bad, but I got four stars.'

"It's the whole kindergarten thing, Mom. I'm alone in there, swimming with the sharks."

'How did you do on the plane geometry exam?' - 'I'm back to square one.'

"Mr. Murillo couldn't understand how I could make so many mistakes. So I told him that you helped me write it."

'This wouldn't have happened if you'd saved to send me to a private school.'

'I'm very creative and creative people are not afraid to fail.'

"Did you know that people with four-year degrees earn twice as much as people with high school degrees?"

"Mom, don't believe it. It's Fake News."

"The A B C's are a mystery to him, but he's very solid on the letter F."

"So this is why you ate your spinach and wanted seconds at dinner!"

"I virtually finished my homework."

A good school report at last...how much did it cost you?

'But I thought you would be pleased-an 'A' plus in sex education,Dad!'

'Mum, they're making fun of me at school because I have a small nose...'

"I didn't make the Dean's list, but I made the Principal's list."

Will Work for Student Loan Payment.

"Here's my report card. You'll be glad to know passing math is now number one on my bucket list."

Gee, dad, a D in French isn't so bad considering I'm flunking English!

"She's a much better guesser than I am...but I am just guessing."