Santa Humor Enthusiast Gifts

"Taking all year to make your stock and then giving it all away is a terrible business model. You're fired!"

Santa Claus's Mail

High security Santa's grotto

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

"I admire your enthusiasm, but you’re not really flying."

"Anything but milk and cookies."

St. Elmo's fired.

'This year I'm deliverying everything FedEx!'

'You still owe me the pony from last year!'

"Pepperoni pizza is my favorite! Ah, Billy, you little suck up!"

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'

Santa 'Freezing' Claus.

Santa CGI Effect

'How do you think he stays so merry through the holidays?!'

"Naughty? Nice? It's a bit more nuanced than that..."

"I want a pony!"

'And that,and that,and that...'

'Well, I'll try, but cheese seems to be the 'must have gift' this year.'

'There really IS a Santa!' Santa busts pets eating his milk and cookies

"For the last time… do not feed bubble gum to the reindeer!"

Why are you insisting on spending Christmas in hospital, Gran? I prefer the Santa here, darling.

'Toys?! Good heavens, no! I made my fortune through commercial endorsements.'

"Amazon wants to open a facility here due to our friendly labor environment."

"Well, what would YOU like for Christmas?"

The Reindeer Strike

"We're wasting our time. He gets them free at work."

For instance, a $25 delivery charge. You'd clean up right there.

Hot food cafe open every day except Christmas Day.

"I can't tel you what an honor it is to be the keynote speaker at the Supply Chain management Seminar."

'After you ask him for the pony, ask him to pay for your college education.'

SANTA'S ATTORNEY

'What do you expect? A red bulb burned out, and you're free till Christmas.'

'It's true, nobody ever elected me C.E.O. However, I always just assumed I was.'

Great Moment in North Pole History

He Sees You When You're Sleeping