Sailing Humor Lover Gifts

"I yam what I yam an' tha's all I yam!' What the hell kind of resume is that."

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

'How long have you operated multi-engines, sailor?'

"Ticket and passport, please."

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

Lighthouse powered by batteries.

'It followed me home, can I keep it?'

"Let’s draw him closer to New Bedford — we’ll get cell service there and Instagram the heck out of this!"

Dead Men Tell No Tales.

Fisherman selling sardines in oil, haddock in oil, cod in oil etc..

'I told you we should have unionized.'

'You should never wear a green parrot with a blue suit.'

"Don't trust his tail—I know a scallywag when I see one."

'What do you mean the men are unhappy! What on earth gives you that idea?'

'I think we should wake the Captain!'

"Oh. . . What shall we do with a sunken trailer?"

Sailor's pipe is a ship's funnel.

Angry pirate looking at angry parrot (wearing diaper) on his shoulder.

"She's sinking alright, Captain. Even the rats are wearing life jackets!"

"Damn it, doesn't anybody on this ship have depth perception?"

'It's bad news for the cabin boy.'

"Have you got an immoral compass? We're looking for a night of fun!"

"Bloody GPS-plotter is going silly again!"

'Oh no! Not 'Barnacle Bill the Sailor', again.'

"Say, does anyone here know how to tie a sailor's knot?"

'After paying for the boat, it's insurance, the docking and gas, I couldn't afford a trailer.'

'I just think it might be a bit too jolly for the captain's taste.'

"Seriously, Mittens, let's let this one go."

Pirate Doctor

A Jack Tar

"After the life he's had, he just said 'What the hell'..."

"Rats, we can't bow ride this one: it's a hovercraft..."