Roulette Rookie Gifts

'They've got $5 tables everywhere here. Where do you feel the luckiest?'

'I love your playing....especially when you stop!'

'I don't like to take chances.'

'First of all, relax.'

Einstein's Theory of Relativity For Dummies

'OK Mr and Mrs Johnson let's spin the wheel and find you a child!'

Destination casinos...

"The pension crisis prompted me to consider alternative invstments. Like Roulette."

'Should I try a three point turn?' - 'Better not, we only have 30 minutes left.'

"I've invented the wheel. We're going to be rich."

"That's great that you're on 8 different social media sites, but how are you at bank reconciliations, accounts payable, and working?"

"Red 14...No, it's black 23, no, no..it's..."

"So...have you ever kissed a girl before?"

'Yes, this is my first time at speed dating. Is it that obvious?'

'I thought I'd try making marmalade. Do we have any marmals?'

Stop looking at me! Whatcha doing? Practicing my part in the spring play. But it's just a walk-on. Exactly! Some actors just talk the talk. I get to walk the walk.

"Hey, not bad! You sound like a real couple already!"

"I'll kiss you later. Catch! I meant catch you later!"

'Insurance?'

"Sorry miss, no split bets please."

Casino

'Son, you just got your first credit card and you're going on a date. My advice: keep it in your pants.'

"I call it, 'wheel'. I spin it, drop this pebble, and if you don't guess where it stops, I take your stuff."

"O.K., don't e-mail this to anyone, but we're shorting black big time."

"Baldo, a young man like you might have a lot of questions...about feelings, emotions...not knowing what is right and wrong. Remember, mi'jo...I'm here if you need me."

'Snake eyes or no snake eyes, the tall, skinny guy at the end of the table wins again.'

Roulette pool.

"So...how'd you like your first kiss?"

'Do you have a backup plan?'

Win/Lose Roulette

Tory election betting.

"I'm sorry, God! We don't allow all-knowing people at our roulette tables."

'You should know my dad's a referee, He has access to instant replay,'

'Which side would you like me to drive on today?'

Christmas Gambles