Romantic Rivalries Pillows

'I've thought it over. No use us fighting and if you want her you can have her.'

"Of course I'm jealous of your last girlfirend Barry, have you seeen the hunk she's with now?"

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

'Shoot, this is nothing, you should have seen how good we had it back in ancient Egypt.'

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

The Alpha Seltzer

"Eat my dust!"

Your enemy is defeated by Fate

'The grudge match.'

The date was going well. She was better looking, but he was about to gain the nutritional edge.

"I'm afraid Dad did not leave us anything of value in his will, but his last wish is for us to continue the feud with the neighbour's cat...

"That's $20 for you if you pluck the tail feathers off my rival over there..."

'I told you, if the LA branch steals our thunder, there is no more dialogue.'

'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!'

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

"What do you mean asking you to marry me via text wasn't romantic? Did you see the emoji with hearts for eyes I attached?"

Wedding Wellies

'Uruguayan? - No, he's from Scotland.'

'I warned him about watching the game at the opposition's pub.'

'Bad news: the report says it's cheaper if cats make it...'

'We think a lot alike - and that threatens my uniqueness to this company.'

"I'm sorry your team lost - perhaps you should have rooted for the other team."

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

'You know my limits, don't you?'

'Wow! Who knows what eroticism lurks in the heart of a sister.'

We should talk...

'The rivalry at the pony club is getting out of hand.'

Mr. Chester's diplomacy

'You're an interesting combination of shallow and thick.'