Romantic Rejuvenator Gifts

"Yoo-hoo. Time to climb the stairway to paradise."

"How am I this morning? Frankly, Mister Never-Around, I'm as horny as the middle-school band."

'I think it's time we got a new headboard.'

We really need to put the mystery back into this relationship... why don't you disappear?

"Normally I wouldn't take any notice of all these ads on how to improve my performance in the bedroom..."

'You have to Marvell eh - 'annihalating all that's made to a green thought in a green shade.''

Kissing the Blarney Stone.

'We never go anywhere together except here.'

"You wanted the magic back in our relationship..."

(Scheduled) Sex, (Prescription) Drugs & (Classic) Rock & Roll

'Who said romance is dead? I just downloaded a screensaver with red roses and chocolates for your PC!'

"We can try and mend the damaged heart, but not a broken one."

"I love what you've done with him."

New life (organ donation)

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

A man sews broken hearts back together.

"Yes, you've taught me a thing or two - but over twenty-plus years that's not much."

"Hey, I know - why don't we go on a little crime spree?"

'The marriage counselor didn't save our marriage. The plumber and the second bathroom saved our marriage.'

'You know I can never stay mad at you. Get in here, ya big galoot.'

"She always gets the upper bunk."

"A see through nighty? God who'd want to see you through that?"

Boss has 'will you marry me, Ingrid?' sign and says, 'Fax this until you get a yes.'

Woman does a strip tease on a remote control.

"I need a box of the gayest chocolate you've got."

'And he seems to think he's God's gift to women.'

'Let's at least give the parabolic mattress a try - the Thompsons swear it saved their marriage.'

"Lately she refers to me as her 'insignificant other'."

"Our marriage has been renewed for another season."

"We're cutting back on therapy. You?"

"Please, Dianna, at least give me a chance to rebrand myself."

'Real Sex is consensual non-cyber + includes conversation.'

'Jeez, Hon - ain't you ever goin' wear your 'yes' jammies again!?'

'She's caught him, but she doesn't seem able to land him.'