Romantic Mischief Enthusiast Pillows

'My ad said I was 'blond with curves' it didn't say anything about me being a woman.'

"Ok, George ... now you've ruined Christmas."

'Alright, which one of you wise guys pulled the fire alarm?'

Mayhem, Inc. Part 15

Playing pig

The Tooth Ferret

'The king wants a gesture, not a jester.'

Halloween health & safety.

Department of Foreign Affairs Foreign Affairs staff and their Mistresses from various parts of the World,having some fun in the office, witnessed by a stunned member of the public.

'She said she was made out of sugar and spice, so I bit her.'

'I thought you said you were taking me to Swan Lake?'

'I'm sorry, Frank, but I think I need some space.'

Bridegroom jumps in the hands of his bride after seeing a mouse

"I never lie to my parents, but sometimes we do interpret event differently."

"Very impressive. . . internet troll."

"You will let me know if I'm boring you with my little stories, won't you dear?"

'They have TWO trees!'

"My husband's lost some interest...can you tattoo me into a giant remote control?"

"Let's just make random clicking noises: it will keep the scientists busy for years trying to decipher our language..."

'Really? A Bride of Satan? Golly, Lucille, why did you wait until our fourth date to tell me you were already married?'

"Who made this mess?"

Hey, wait a sec … Forget it! If you think I'm letting you off the hook for forgetting our anniversary, think again! Didn't you also accuse me of forgetting it just a couple of months ago? What date were we hitched? Don't change the subject.

"Harry! You?"

"Watch this!"

"Fred, listen. Can you hear me? The desensitizing cream - it's for external use."

"I don't like sweetcorn".

No, dear, you didn

'Yeah, girls smell good, but don't let THAT fool you!'

"Yo, Angela! The good news is I found your vibrator..."

Flirtation

I got arrested for posting misinformation on the internet, I told a dating agency I was 6' 2".

The Cornucopia Trap

"They think I made them in MY image? How did they get THAT idea?"

'The postman woke me up at five this morning... That's the last time I sleep with him.'

"Fred, listen! Can you hear me? The desensitizing cream - it's for external use."