Romance Restorer Gifts

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

(Scheduled) Sex, (Prescription) Drugs & (Classic) Rock & Roll

'Who said romance is dead? I just downloaded a screensaver with red roses and chocolates for your PC!'

"We can try and mend the damaged heart, but not a broken one."

'You used to make love to me like a Flying Scotsman, now you're more like a Puffing Billy!'

"Yes, you've taught me a thing or two - but over twenty-plus years that's not much."

"Wow! I must be dreaming!"

'I think it's time we got a new headboard.'

Wife to husband about water shot from lapel flower: 'When I said we should put the magic back in our marriage, Steve ...'

'You know I can never stay mad at you. Get in here, ya big galoot.'

'Let's at least give the parabolic mattress a try - the Thompsons swear it saved their marriage.'

"I told you she'd had some work done."

"Normally I wouldn't take any notice of all these ads on how to improve my performance in the bedroom..."

'Real Sex is consensual non-cyber + includes conversation.'

Ducttape Man! I'll mend your broken heart!

"He used to be romantic. Now I'm trying to restore him to his default settings."

"You've got a green light - use it!"

"Oh, darling, whatever happens- ever- I know I'm probably always going to remember this as one of my happiest marriages."

An old couple visit a woods where they once carved their name in a tree and discover it has bee cut down.

"I'm afraid we've lost that loving feeling."

Cardiology

'Mitch, the Insurance Claim Adjuster, above a sea of fog' - Tribute to Caspar David Friedrich.

'When was the last time you had a tune up?'

"I remember the days when you used to pull my hair like that!"

Man and a woman sit in a living room; a sign on the wall behind them reads "100% Recycled Conversation".

"When I said it would be sexy if you were more ANIMAL in bed... I was thinking of a tiger!"

"I was so busy worrying that she only loved me because of my money that I lost her AND the money!"

"Can't you just glue it back on?"

'I can't remember the last time I saw you do something cute.'

'If I can't put her out of her misery, at least I can put myself out of mine.'

"I shall always remember this church for 3 things - aisle, altar, hymn!"

We really need to put the mystery back into this relationship... why don't you disappear?

'Who said romance is dead?'

Mrs Pinchwife- Probably Intended for an Edition of Wycherley's Country Wife