Religion Humor Lover Gifts

"I TOLD you they have hard water around here."

'In conclusion, it's more blessed to give than retrieve.'

'The minister's trying something new to encourage more contributions to the Sunday collection.'

'Nobody's leaving till I get the offering plate back!'

"What do you weirdos want?!"

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

"You call this a constitution?"

Dogma

"I certainly trust this meal is kosher."

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

'It's good to see you, Mr. McWit, but you do realize that today is neither Christmas or Easter?'

"I've heard great things about your church. Thought I would visit and say keep up the good work."

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

"Don't forget to rate us on stable-BnB."

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

United Church of OMG

'Please take your receipt!'

"Since we now have a leaking roof problem, it might be a good time to schedule baptisms."

Paul was Generally Considered the Cutest Apostle

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

"Bit big for a cherub, isn't it, Brother Ignatious?"

Finger puppets in church.

'Turn the other cheek, reverend.'

The Vatican's undercover mission to Antarctica, and some endangered penguins.

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"I was kind of hoping just to tell them what they want to hear...."

A woman in prayer

"Dearly beloved, and others..."

"...I'll send you for an amniocentesis."

Pre-nuptual Nativity

Nativity - The sitcom

"This wandering in the desert for forty years thing -- It IS allegorical, isn't it?"

When The Seven Deadly Sins Come Knocking.

Male On Sunday

"Holy moly!"