Religious Humor Lovers Gifts

'Why should I pay you for washing the windows when the good Lord provides?'

"Sister Theresa, who was St. Regis?"

"OK, OK, Dad. I'm up... I'm up."

Moses parts the Red Sea.

'Lot was told to take his wife and daughter and flee from Sodom.'

'Holy-Kanoly' makes his infamous 'Leap-of-Faith' jump.

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"OMG, LOL!"

"You call this a constitution?"

"I certainly trust this meal is kosher."

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

Dogma

"This Adam and Eve thing -- Is there a warranty?"

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

'The Brothers of the Order of Saint Orson, patron saint of fried foods'

'It's good to see you, Mr. McWit, but you do realize that today is neither Christmas or Easter?'

"I've heard great things about your church. Thought I would visit and say keep up the good work."

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

Sermon Applause.

'Please take your receipt!'

"Does the ark have wifi?"

"Since we now have a leaking roof problem, it might be a good time to schedule baptisms."

'This whole Noah's Ark business sounds like a quota system to me!'

Paul was Generally Considered the Cutest Apostle

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

"Dearly beloved, and others..."

Moses' first encounter with the burning bush didn't go well.

"I was kind of hoping just to tell them what they want to hear...."

Finger puppets in church.

"Bit big for a cherub, isn't it, Brother Ignatious?"

'Dad, if God rested on the seventh day, who milked the cows?'

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

The Vatican's undercover mission to Antarctica, and some endangered penguins.

"Pastor Bob is the leader of the flock, son, not the herd."

A woman in prayer