Relationship Jugglers Pillows

'We still aren't talking to each other. Could you tell him, 'I do'?'

"Good night. Sleep quietly."

The Joy Of Txt...

'I think someone's asking to go out.'

Kid and Three Wives to Support.

How about swapping wives for the day?

The headlanders meet the heartlanders.

"He's nice, but not having to self isolate with nice!"

"What? You know know I hate to be called a quitter."

"My best friend ran away...WITHOUT my wife."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

'Honey, I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

That may well be how the catalk models do it, but I still think you look like a three legged horse in a field of cowpats!

Supermom.

'Can you do more work then is humanly possible?'

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

"This will be hilarious!"

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

The prying mantis,

She - Interpreter - He.

"Dave, could you hold on a sec while I take care of some personal business?"

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

Multi-Tasking

"Harold insists on doing all his own stunts."

"It's no good - I just can't do this without a brief and a deadline."

'When I'm not thinking about me, the Giants, the Knicks or the Yankees, I'm thinking about us.'

Sulk Shows

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

"How do you love me. Count the ways!"

"Dammit Harold, you know I hate that mask!"