Relationship Insights Fanatic Pillows

"Don't even start, Claire. You knew I was a snake when you took me in."

Relationship counselor: 'She started behaving strangely, and our man-machine interface has become unpredictable.'

"I don't know about you, but I'm ready to take this marriage full-throttle."

Paint pots in love

Urns in love

(Man with 'BEFORE sign): 'My wife says I'm a work-in-progress.'

'Don't worry, Alice. I won't leave you.'

"I opened the last of the emergency wine."

"I'm not laughing at you, dear-I'm laughing with everyone but you."

"Maybe what she really wants you to do is rub her tummy."

"Take a look - that's us in ninety years."

' You're wonderful.' 'I know.'

An evening with Stanley Bucholtz, relationship MD,,,tonight: 'Just ONE evening,,,'

'Here's to being in love, in a hurry, and in debt.'

Growing Love

Tunnel of Love and the Tunnel of Mutual Respect and Admiration.

Speech-bubble-head-boy loves think-bubble-head-girl.

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

'That's one of those May-December love affairs. He's 251 years old, and she can't be a day over 135!'

'We've entered the 'password sharing' phase of our relationship!'

A Friend in Need.

"I'll tell you what he's got that we haven't - a bigger leaf!"

"Too desperate?"

'Now then, let me explain the rules of this therapy.'

"What on earth do they find to talk about?"

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't - You're not prejudiced against transvestites, are you?"

"I'm looking for a man who has an unwavering character, except when he's talking to me."

'Not an orgasm, just the bed springs, I'm afraid.'

Love

"Legs up to here!"

'Would you like a romantic table or are you married?'

Going into the relationship, Tom knew Loretta was a package deal.