Relationship Enthusiast Pillows

"I had a nice time, Steve. Would you like to come in, settle down, and raise a family?"

"Can we talk through a decision that I've already made?"

' You're wonderful.' 'I know.'

'Sex is good!'

'We've entered the 'password sharing' phase of our relationship!'

"Oh I know when my wife is upset: She stops singing to me and starts talking..."

' Then he had the nerve to say he likes plump women!'

"If you're not going to make something of yourself would you mind if I tried?"

'Regret that we had Siamese Attachment Surgery? Never!'

"Of course, we love you. Hasn't Maria told you?"

"I'm afraid that if I share my vulnerabilities they become part of the public domain."

"I found an older man that I want to spend the rest of his life with."

"It's not you, Adam. It's men."

"We've been happily married for five years. Next week we celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary."

'I'm worried about the wife, Doctor. She hasn't contradicted me all day!'

Chalk and cheese.

'One with rose-coloured spectacles might be good' (man at a dating agency)

An evening with Stanley Bucholtz, relationship MD,,,tonight: 'Just ONE evening,,,'

"While you're at it, could you give him some pizzazz?"

Evolution of Marriage

"You want a child. I want to act like a child. Isn't that enough?"

'We need to bark.'

'Love between two people is very beautiful. And between six it's fantastic!'

'....in fact, I don't even know why Mrs. Goldberg put us together.'

'Do you ever watch your wife's face while you're making love?'

'She got divorced again.'

'A second honeymoon? - Are you asking for a do-over?'

"If you had to give me high marks for something, what would it be?"

'Here's to being in love, in a hurry, and in debt.'

"I can't believe we've been married for 10 years and you never told me you had another leg!"

Keeping your marriage interesting

"Good news! I'm renewing our relationship for a second season."

"I'm pregnant"

"You might like my daughter. She's single and desperate too."

"Best of all, he has this wonderful passion for life that he doesn't expect me to share."