Ranch Adventures Gifts

Young Buffalo: 'Hello Mrs.Broadhouse,can Billy come out and Roam?'

"It seemed like miles to me!"

Dang! My shorts are riding up on me again!

'I still want to be a cowboy.'

'All right. I'll count sheep, but I thought we were cattlemen.'

'Another nice thing about working here, they tend to promote from within.'

'If you're not doing anything, come on over and we'll shoot the bull!'

"She just loves them - she's a total girl horse."

'Wow! Look everyone, Tarquin's lassooed a snake!'

'..The wolves have got the sheep pinned against their own 1-yard line again!'

Bumper Stickers on a Cowboy's Horse

Ranch Dressing

And if you help drive the herd all the way to Kansas City, you get to keep one steer for yourself! The first stock option.

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

"I've decided to replace the sod floor with tile."

'Mom, I think it's time I graduated to a full size horse.'

"Speed bumps have reduced stampede injuries."

Just another day at Helium Farm

All the other land having been claimed and fenced already, Jedidiah bought his own range from the big box store.

Cowboy Slippers

'Hello, Doc Barnes? I just got your bill. You've just bought yourself a cow.'

'My wife, my rancher, his artificial insemination device!'

'No, I own the cattle. He's the vet!'

'Can't understand all this fuss over cattle growth hormones.'

'According to your resume you're an experienced ranch hand...I knew I should have checked your references!'

"Yes, we've been lost before, but never this lost."

Making Things Pleasant.

'He's on steeroids.'

Western Philosophy

"It's broken I'm afraid." "Will I be able to work?" "Depends. What do you do?" "Oh, I'm just a cowpoke for Circle 'Y' Ranch."

'I don't feel at home on the range any more!'

'I'm a fat cattle buyer.'

"You're wearing it backwards."

'Well any Pal o' yours is a pal o' mine.'

Heenan Sayers Fight- Heenan's New Training base, J Pocock's Farm near Bath