Raising Chickens Gifts

"No, he's not my first. I've had dozens."

"I'm off girls...gonna make the most of being an empty nester, while it lasts!!"

'Until we had our own chickens, we just felt like tacit supporters of the whole Military-Poultry-Complex thing.'

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

Norman's decision to raise chickens first in the back yard, then the front yard and eventually the living room would cause great dismay the day his car keys went missing.

"Everyday I lay a few eggs and when I come back from breakfast they're gone!"

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

Silence of the Chickens...

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

"She wishes to range free!"

'Chicken Farms - Pecking Order'

Where Deviled Eggs come from

"I can assure you ladies all our eggs come from free range chickens."

'Superstock'

'Can he come out and play?'

'She looks just like you when you were that age.'

Lady taking her Cochin chickens for a walk.

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

"Hurray! I just got born!"

"Shouldn't there be some sort of pecking order around here?"

'I admire your can-cock-a-doodle-do attitude.'

"I've had 720 children. I hope they're all doing well."

Dogs and Chickens

'George, stop playing with the children.'

"Yeah, our garden is always a mess: We can't stop ourselves foraging for worms..."

Cop gives ASBO to cockerel: 'This of this as a cock-a-doodle-don't.'

"My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm...."

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

'This is taking too long - we'll have to induce hatching.'

"You knew I was a migratory bird when you married."

"Gesundtheit, Dear."

'Step on it, Larry.'

'Let's go, Denmore. The free-range chickens are stampeding towards the canyon.'

"Mum, what is a nugget?"

"No one can afford to eat us anymore."