Railway Humor Aficionado Gifts

"No, on second thoughts, let's walk"

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

Replacement Bus Spotters.

HS2

"Is this the Canterbury Train?"

A train's dining car is a diner.

The Train to Nowhere

Isambard Kingdom Brunel.

Railway 'King' George Hudson

"That last applicant showed real promise. Did you notice the way he mumbled all through the interview?"

"Conjoined twins were born in a bed on a passenger train. They were separated at berth."

Hey, wow, Trevor's found a way to trainspot on the internet.

Trainspotting.

Auditions: To Perform at Metro Stations Today.

"Hi! It's me...I've gone off the rails"

Credit Mobilier Scandle Rocks the Republican Party

'We apologise for the late arrival of the 9.38 to...'

A Dog In A Train Carriage.

'Intermodal' cargo train carrige hurtling through space

'...that's a bit different for 8:45!'

"I'd like a couple of rail replacement buses please. . ."

'Okay, which one of you guys just tooted?'

Fare Evader

'Not only does he have a one-track mind...it's also narrow gauge.'

"For your information, this 'stuff' happens to be my husband!"

Trainspotter spotting: 'Gosh! A type 406 with original thermos.'

'It's the acceptable face of the high-speed rail link.'

'Of course you can't understand a word he says, he's the station tannoy announcer.'

Ridiculed for arriving in Washington in private jets, the Big Three auto CEOs found a more humble way to travel.

'Yes, I am sure this ticket is out of date. London to Manchester return, three pounds, nine shillings and six pence. . .'

"You want a shuffle flight to Buffalo?"

Huge lady lady sitting down on a crowded bus

'Hot enough for you?'

Model steam train pulls into a station

Railway Charging