Railway Humor Gifts

Platform Position Plan

A horse and cart metamorphosing into a snail.

King Commute.

Auditions: To Perform at Metro Stations Today.

Fare Evader

'Not only does he have a one-track mind...it's also narrow gauge.'

'It's the acceptable face of the high-speed rail link.'

'Of course you can't understand a word he says, he's the station tannoy announcer.'

"We apologise for the late arrival of the 1945 train...."

Huge lady lady sitting down on a crowded bus

Ridiculed for arriving in Washington in private jets, the Big Three auto CEOs found a more humble way to travel.

"Because of track work, uptown trains are going downtown, and downtown trains are going uptown."

'Hi I'm on the train...still'

Replacement Bus Service

Replacement Bus Service Spotter

'I love the leg room.'

Mastermind - "You've chosen rail ticket conditions 1998-99."

"Looks like the trains aren't running again."

'But you kept saying the rhythm was gonna get you.'

Metrognome

Rail PLC - 'We're investing in bottlenecks.'

'You don't actually believe you are going to catch a train?!'

The Jitney 'Cross The Styx

Eurostar: In Emergency No Deal Brexit Break Window

Hip skater sees commuters on skateboard.

Desert Island Cycle Path

In the event of emergency, break glass gently.

"Ladies and gentlemen, the Queen of the Hop and the Duke of Earl."

"Sorry mate, last train's gone."

Autumn of Discontent

"Sorry, we don't go to the middle, yet."

"No, this bus doesn't have a 'business class.'"

'This is less stress than riding in the little clown cars.'

Jolly for Jones.

"Ugh...I hate being the third rail."