Race Track Regulars Gifts

Itchy Butt 50

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

"I run around this high school track every morning."

"Here's something extra to cover his lousy tip. Blame his fifth grade math teacher."

Disraeli's Reform Bill Passes the Committee Stage

Runner going through hurdles.

'Why do you always win at cards but not horses? I can't shuffle the horses.'

'I hate running in the outside lane.'

'He's known as the hardest-driving track coach in the country.'

T-Rex Racing: A Short-Lived Sport

"I'll bet you were good at making skid marks?"

Before becoming the legend that he is today, Nostradamus first enjoyed a pretty good living at the tracks.

"I know, I know — it looks silly, but you can’t imagine how warm I am."

'Do you think he'll win the second race?'

"A man and his choo-choo."

'The blooming thing took a wrong turn off the course.'

'Why did he cut the chicane - the giant spider isn't on the track, he's on our screen.'

'I like the look of that Trojan Boy.'

'On your mark, get set...'

Pit Stop for Track and Field

The steeple-chase. Man reads a sign stating that no horseman is allowed to follow the racehorses over the course.

'How did it go at the track today, dear?'

'So you've won a few races: I still don't think you need worry about the paparazzi!'

It's very quick and looks great in speed camera photos.

'I'd bet that with that race engine, you could beat anybody to the neighborhood grocery store.'

"They're flipping to see who pays for the meal."

'Lost again. I hope you kept a diary of your trip.'

'Hi, I'm Raoul...I shall be your talking point of the evening.'

'Your wife borrowed the car.'

Race Horses See Big People.

'Great idea, Pete!'