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Big Bob knew it was wrong, but gosh darn it, someone had to stick up for the little guy.

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

The Awful Lawfuls Chapter 10

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

"POOPIN'! It's the Butt Signal!"

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

The Family Joules: Part 5

A Witch Consults Her Magic Mirror

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

How I met your mother

"Well, sir, it looks like things are getting pretty serious for Peter and Pauline."

"Tell us again about the humpback of Notre dame."

"Sorry Darling, you are fabulous, but I'm searching for MY Prince too!"

Fishing.

"This little piggy went to market, this little piggy drove the getaway car..."

Cell phones seem as if they are designed for a T-Rex!

"Really, Larry? Of all the things that could have bitten you, you get a wereduck?"

"I've finally finished my lockdown novel."

Pets in Attorney's office - 'The iguana gets everything.'

"Come in, minion."

'I've discovered a talking amoeba!' '2+2=4, 5-4=1, 93=3.' SMASH 'I wanted to get it before it multiplied.'

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

"Your article on the safe storage of combustibles is quite good, but I think you should leave out the part about the wicked witch setting you on fire."

"Come with us to see the wizard. He can find you a brain!"

Centaur falls in love.

Chicken Funeral Planning.

'I've written a poem describing my feelings on discovering the body, Inspector...'

Hog Futures

'A book very interesting'

"Convicts selling novels from prison? At least that could never happen here, eh Jones?"

'Miss Wilson, get on the web and find me everything on bottles!'