Quirky Researcher Gifts

'It doesn't matter that your thesis is on extra sensory perception, you can't cite mindreading in your references.'

'On the other hand, maybe humor shouldn't be analyzed.'

"The great thing about studying tiny things is that no one knows what the hell you're doing."

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

'They want us to double check our methodology. Your turn to flip.'

Genius Grants and Recipients

Professor Yomp at our Northern campus: Man waves from igloo doorway(Blubber research)

Anti-gravity Research Lab

"At the biological clock institute'

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

'Ever since I had a disease named after me, people seem to keep their distance.'

'Are you sure Anderson is working on the Human Genome Project?'

'I'm writing my dissertation on Latte Sizes.'

Great progress has been made in the science of genetic clowning.

Science Experiment.

Genetic Fingerprinting.

'Find me everything you can get on the fastest getaway cars.'

'He's a prodigy all right, but all his work deals with subjects such as the elasticity of bubble gum, the decibel limits of rock records and the molecular content of a cheeseburger.'

Impartial Testing: "Eeny, meeny, money, moe..."

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

The Map of the human brain

'Hey weirdo, where do you think you're going?'

'If no man is an island, then what the hell is no woman?'

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

'How's the gene-splicing going? Cloned any new hepatitis antibodies?'

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

"Am I sensing fear?"

On-the-job creativity may go unrewarded an may even create consternation among co-workers.

Reverse Ageing Laboratory

"...Wow, if Malcolm Gladwell is right, we need to get a cat who's a Virgo ASAP!"

'I know it's controversial, but my calculations prove beyond doubt that a nod is BETTER than a wink.'