Quirky Gifters Pillows

"I'm not social distancing. I just don't like you."

The firefighter cares!

Santa gives the earth the Covid-19 vaccine

"Mistletoe and fruitcake instead of flowers and candy for Valentine's Day? You're recycling Christmas stuff, aren't you."

Hand Sanitiser in the Middle of the Ocean

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"All natural snow cones for sale."

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

God putting the finishing touches to the Pug.

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

Easter Island Cheeseheads

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

Emergency Phone.

Excess Baggage: Some people take getting away from it all very seriously.

Ball as water-melon.

You don't need to believe EVERYTHING you are told.

"Happy Anniversary, dear! It's a gold spray-painted macaroni necklace."

'We have three minutes left.'

"'How We Die' - fabulous!"

How Amazon was invented

"It's my home grown quail call. Quail don't come when I blow it, but cows sure do."

A watch face with Stonehenge

"And at no extra charge I can give your old suit a Viking funeral."

'It's another corporate lawyer...do we want to buy a soul?'

Diner

Fly fishing.

Whittling a forget-me-not moose for the one you adore...

High speed cinder block

Where Deviled Eggs come from

"Waiter, this is the worst meal I've ever tasted. And believe me, I've eaten some crap!"

That must be my computer date... (Answers door to robot).