Punderful Pet Lover Gifts

Literate Dogs.

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

Boy with a whale: 'He followed me home, Dad, can I keep him?'

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

"He was a dog person, I was a cat person, the answer was a ferret."

"Lap fish..."

'I just love that little fluffy grey kitten!'

"What? Don't yuck my yum!"

Separation

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

Woman keeping a chicken in her room for fresh eggs

Upper East Side Dog Park

'He won't eat his lettuce until I've washed it five times. I'm sure his OCD is getting worse!'

'Click it or ticket.'

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

Priest with the Pet Devil.

'Mutt is very insulting and definitely politically incorrect, but where do I find an animal rights attorney at this hour of the night?'

Fish in Water Cooler.

Cat on a psychiatrist's couch: 'Truth is, I'm not really a cat person.'

"Is it OK if I turn the humidifier up a bit?"

'Oh, that's Corky's way of saying hello.'

'Apart from Charlie here, I don't have any problems with slugs'

'It's only temporary until we can find a good home for the cats.'

The pet shop of Doctor Moreau

Joey tries to teach his pet rock how to swim.

When Pugs dream.

"Why would I care of you scratch the couch? I'm not allowed on it..."

'Interesting. . . 'While dogs respond to dog whistles, wolverines respond only to cash and traveler's checks.''

A sausage dog shrinking after toileting

'Nature abhors a vacuum. Nature is my cat.'

"She's a weiner cat."

'Why do they refuse to drink water out of a bowl that's been left out for two hours, but go gaga over toilet water?'

'No more lobsters, my wife said, after our last one died.'

''No, Ma,am', I said. 'I'm not taking anybody's pet pig for a walk in a baby carriage' and then she doubled my salary.'