Pta Powerhouse Gifts

'How's the school board meeting going?'

'Mom, you're so popular! It was unanimous when I volunteered you to head the team fund raiser!'

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

'I made my own list of My World's 100 Most Powerful Women!'

'Tommy's doing fine. I'm concerned about your poor fund-raising record. You sold only two magazine subscriptions and one measly candy bar.'

Corporate Whore.

Now I'll open up the floor to questions and batsh*t crazy rants.

'Ooops! My mistake. That was the yearly budget estimate, no the monthly estimate.'

'Get me a hundred milligrams of Oxycontin... And pick up something for this guy while you're at it.'

"Your wife's on the phone...."

"You've got pussyfooting from 10 to 11, shilly-shallying until 12, then hemming and hawing the rest of the afternoon."

He was the kind of boss who evoked extreme emotions.

'Can you Type?'

'Frankly, I don't remember why I called this meeting.'

"I tend to get more done when I leave self-loathing off the to-do list."

'My goodness, is it fall already, Ms. Smyrka?'

'What's this 'H' file?'

'Why don't you go and borrow Jeff's tools? While you're at it, borrow Jeff.'

'Sometimes the boss exerts too much pressure about meeting a project deadline.'

"Well, for this amount we could do you a nice word-of-mouth campaign!"

"I believe a healthy employee is a productive employee. So from now when you get me coffee, I'd like you to run."

'Hello, Mrs. Horton? Could you please stop by school this afternoon?'

"They're considering order-fulfillment as a new Olympic sport."

"She scares the hell out of me. She's brainy, creative and sexy."

"Do you realize that the only change we have had, in this school, is in our school telephone number?"

'Darling, I've just deleted the computer,'

'Will He know what this is regarding?'

'I do hope Nauinski is not thinking of cheating!'

"Same old, same old, men seem intimidated by a strong woman..."

Buy- out specialist

Employee receiving compensation

Mom's Gym

Man receiving a fax

'It's from the Security Council of the PTA!'

"He's working out well for the copycat position."