Pa Gifts

"You've got pussyfooting from 10 to 11, shilly-shallying until 12, then hemming and hawing the rest of the afternoon."

'Frankly, I don't remember why I called this meeting.'

'I thought we agreed,one would do mornings and one the afternoons!'

"I believe a healthy employee is a productive employee. So from now when you get me coffee, I'd like you to run."

He was the kind of boss who evoked extreme emotions.

Man receiving a fax

'Darling, I've just deleted the computer,'

'Will He know what this is regarding?'

"He's working out well for the copycat position."

'What's this 'H' file?'

'Can you Type?'

'I see you've developed your own filing system, Miss Peach!'

"Your wife's on the phone...."

Out Of Sight / Out Of Mind

Employee receiving compensation

'My goodness, is it fall already, Ms. Smyrka?'

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

City Zoo: Day Care

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Good game."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

2021

Skipping Horse

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."