Property Pun Enthusiasts Pillows

' We're last time buyers...'

"... It's a housing bubble."

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

Tidy it up for the open house, and it wouldn't hurt to put out some freshly regurgitated worms. For sale.

' I gather you wish to reassign your lease, Higgins.'

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

"Look, son, real estate."

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

'For Sale by Neighbor'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

"Hello, and welcome to 'Homes Under the Hammer. . .'"

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

Home Sweet Second Home.

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

An exaggeration of estate agents

Mouse real estate!

'On the face of it, it sounds great that she left me her house, but it has gone stale and what Hansel and Gretel didn't eat the birds have had a go at.'

'So what if you found it? Whatever it is, it belongs to ME! Now, get off my beach!'

"Well, it is a good property. The price is low because it is harder to negotiate due to its S-bend configuration."

'This place is rather unusually located. Do you folks like sunsets?'

House hunting is cruel.

'This is close enough.'

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

'A great location and only one step from the beach.'

Dog Realtor

'Don't wait too long to decide. A house with a view like this can go at any minute....'

"I told you we should have sold last winter."

'It seems good, and he said the bit at the bottom is the name of the architect.'

"And the bathroom has a water view...if you fill the tub."

'I think you'll all rest easy knowing this is a gated community!'

'I think you'll find it open and spacious!'

'If straw and sticks don't appeal, I do have something in brick that might interest you.'