Real Estate Pun Lover Pillows

'I hope buying this house won't sink us.'

"I prefer the term "urban timeshare" to "homeless shelter".

Home tutor

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

Do you mind if we stop calling this a "starter house" now?

Tidy it up for the open house, and it wouldn't hurt to put out some freshly regurgitated worms. For sale.

' I gather you wish to reassign your lease, Higgins.'

"Hello, and welcome to 'Homes Under the Hammer. . .'"

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

An exaggeration of estate agents

Mouse real estate!

'Someday, Son, all this will be your ex-wife's.'

'Now from this room you can get a great view of the whales going by!'

'Now, it does require some modernisation. . . .'

"The high price is due to the great view of the beach."

'This place is rather unusually located. Do you folks like sunsets?'

Estate Agents: Executive Homes

'A great location and only one step from the beach.'

"Efficiency tombs available"

"Well, it is a good property. The price is low because it is harder to negotiate due to its S-bend configuration."

'Is the fire included?'

"For sale £470,000 house included"

'Here's the 2 acres of beachfront property you bought - too bad it's only six inches wide.'

"Come climate change, you could find yourself sitting beach-front on the French riviera."

'Bless. Wayne's made his first affordable home sand estate.'

"As president of the tenants' association, I have to inform you that our list of grievances has been eaten."

'It mostly scares the realtors.'

"We figured why not make some money while we migrate south."

"Every once in a while this house comes with a pool."

"The current owners removed a number of walls and used soft, neutral tones to create a very spacious, open concept."

"Yes, it's nice, but it's lost twenty per-cent of its value in the past year."

'Three words doc, why you should buy...dislocation,dislocation,dislocation.'

'There are no skeletons in the closets but you might have troubles with those in the back yard.'

Real estate.

Coming Soon- Trump Circle