Professional Punster Gifts

Professional Cell Phone Accessories

'I'd never bite the hand that feeds me - but I won't pull its finger, either.'

'I'm the veterinarian of Cheshire who spays and neuters Cheshire pets.'

'Jurassic Pork.'

I think you're ace

Dogs life

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

Note Book

"Igor, you fool! I said 'healthy brain'!"

Garden of Eden and scrumping

"YAY! FREE SHIPPING!"

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."

A-Hem! I'm still singing here!

'Gluten-free manna will come in the second salvo.'

'Well yes, we lost, but you asked me if I was a Legal Eagle, not if I was a good lawyer...'

'Well, you were convicted on three out of ten counts - at least we beat the point spread.'

"I take it you'l like to open joint accounts. . ."

'My mom says an apple a day keeps the physician's assistant away.'

"We wuz robed!"

'Hey, Lady, this is a sixty zone!'

'We could have saved an awful lot of bother and just given him a shot a hole.'

'My broker swears it's a great investment but I fear it's just another pyramid scheme.'

'I think he'll be okay. He had a mild brush stroke.'

Mobile Holmes.

'I'm only doing pro-bono cases until I can find some well-paying anti-bono cases.'

Surfin' the web.

Baby Grand Larceny

'I have a rasp in my throat.'

Timmy Gets Solitary.

conversing using table tennis technology

"Your lives will continue to stink until you find your center."

Wash and Let My People Go

"They weren't very friendly when they proscuted me for obtaining loans under false names."

"I'm afraid you've got a serious case of polka dots."

'I hope you get an ice cream headache!'