Productive Procrastinators Gifts

£150,000 Per Annum - Daydreaming again, Foster?

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

"The meeting will last until lunch, or hell freezes over, whichever is longer."

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"Better start moving towards shelter: the weather forecast is for rain this afternoon..."

'I'm just going to go and slip into something more comfortable, like denial.'

Man needs to buy excuse for missing work from vending machine.

Is plagiarism the same as value adding?

"I tried getting good grades without studying, but it isn't working."

"Never do today what someone else can do tomorrow."

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

How lazy people decide what to eat

Chairmen of the Bored

"This next song's from the soundtrack to the film of the book I never got around to writing."

"I wish I could lay there all day watching funny cat videos..."

Could I have a minute of your valuable time, Timpson?

In, Out, Shake it all about

'I understand you have nothing to do, York.'

Procrastinators Incorporated

'A cyber-terrorist stole my homework. I have a note from the CIA. '

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

"He's my hero. At 5 he just knocks everything off his desk and calls it a day."

"It's hard being a TV viewer trapped in the body of a student."

"Let me call you back, Lori. I'm binge-watching John clean the gutters."

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

Working from home to-do list.

"Have you ever had one of those days when it would have been easier just to do some work?"

'I prefer to work vicariously as opposed to remotely.'

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.