Procrastinators Gifts

Ostrich with head in sand.

As the horrible signs began to appear, students would go to any length to avoid seeing them.

'Don't strain yourself, make two trips.'

Break Glass in Case of Emergency

That guy's always running late.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. That's a relief! How much can they expect out of your on your first day?

I don't know why people say bad things about instant gratification. Personally, I have only one complaint about it: it takes too long.

Ostrich in an hourglass puts its head in the ground.

"Quick, make a mess. Company's coming."

"Sorry I'm late: I got entangled in the darn cocoon!"

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"The meeting will last until lunch, or hell freezes over, whichever is longer."

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"Better start moving towards shelter: the weather forecast is for rain this afternoon..."

'Truth? I am just looking out the window...'

"Why can't I get anything done unless I'm totally stressed out about it?" "Is it possible to be relaxed and still be productive?" "What is wrong with my brain?" "Why don't you work better?"

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"I tried getting good grades without studying, but it isn't working."

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

"I really start dragon around 3 o'clock."

Travelogue

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

"I wasn't expecting to be in here for so long."

Indecision and Outrage Trays