Planner Procrastinator Gifts

'You dropped your day planner.'

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

'I'm just going to go and slip into something more comfortable, like denial.'

Man needs to buy excuse for missing work from vending machine.

The Forever Stamp

The Graveyard of Past Deadlines

"Have you ever had one of those days when it would have been easier just to do some work?"

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

Working from home to-do list.

'I prefer to work vicariously as opposed to remotely.'

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

Al, The Go-From Guy

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

"My five least favorite words in the world: By End of the Day Friday!"

Invaders from Planet Manava.

'Hey, boss, what's a 7 letter work starting with 'w' that represents what I should be doing rather than solving crossword puzzles?'

The meeting will start a little late, intelligence is lost in the building somewhere.

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

"I hate going into a staff meeting without a clear exit strategy."

The Procrastinatorium.

'Sorry I'm late getting home from work. I overslept.'

"The Procrastination World Championships were only a month away. He never trained so hard."

"The pastor can't be disturbed. He's preparing for Sunday's service."

Bummer Time Streaming

Thanks for making the breakfast meeting, Harris.

"How about fashionably never?"