Procrastination Procrastinators Gifts

Future Site of the Procrastination Help Centre - Opening Fall of 1996

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"The meeting will last until lunch, or hell freezes over, whichever is longer."

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"Why can't I get anything done unless I'm totally stressed out about it?" "Is it possible to be relaxed and still be productive?" "What is wrong with my brain?" "Why don't you work better?"

"Better start moving towards shelter: the weather forecast is for rain this afternoon..."

'Truth? I am just looking out the window...'

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

Fact: The average person spends 4.3 hours per week looking for things that are misplaced, misfiled or mislabeled.

"I wasn't expecting to be in here for so long."

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

"Never do today what someone else can do tomorrow."

"Sitting here with you each day at sunset reminds me I have to get a job."

Travelogue

"I really start dragon around 3 o'clock."

Indecision and Outrage Trays

"That's it - your diet starts tomorrow"

'I understand you have nothing to do, York.'

"Not tonight, Jon. I have to clean for the cleaning lady."

"This next song's from the soundtrack to the film of the book I never got around to writing."

In, Out, Shake it all about

The four housemen of procrastination

"I'll start thinking outside the box when the box is empty."

The Graveyard of Past Deadlines