Product Development Fan Gifts

'Now that we've discovered a great new laundry detergent, let's try to discover an appropriate price point.'

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

Time Machine Collision

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

Nurse's introduction training - "We don't get the quality of student we used to"

"Barbara, will you check your texts for a ring emoji?"

'This reminds me...what generation iPhone are you?'

'Hey...here's a hot prospect...likes catching frisbees, chasing squirrels, rolling in smelly stuff...'

"Hello? JS electrical? It's about this flat screen television I purchased from you."

Gah! My Timotei is dead. - 'But what have we here? Tresemme with orange, mango, and passionfruit.' - 'Mmmm... passionfruit...' - '*Glug* *Glug* *Glug*' -

"It appears you have a virus."

Workplace Confidentiality.

'My laptop's being repaired and I felt lost without a screensaver to stare at.'

"We just made a big cancer breakthrough. Have a cigar."

Smile you're on camera! You're also on my podcast!

The Woman Who Could Talk to Engineers...

Resume Consultant. I can polish up your resume, but I won't be able to pound all the dents. (Published originally on Janurary 8, 2009.)

When beavers dream.

'All I'm saying is that if we don't want to be invaded, we'd be better off with weapons of mass destruction.'

'Very impressive resume... new printer?'

"OK, you're right. It does say take 2 tablets by mouth."

"How am I going to put in a new tape?"

"Everyone here is bonding over pictures of their dogs."

'Maybe we should get into high-tech.'

'And then, after soccer practice, we stopped at crazy Al's Big Screen TV Store!'

Duracell bunny joins marching drummers

Selfie Extension Stik

"There's no need to shout!"

Tweeted

"Bad news. The competition brought in 13 coupons and seventy thousand reasonable facsimiles."

Line up for the latest thing! Buy it now!

Pizza. I found the remote but now I can't find the TV.

'I warned you that it wasn't user friendly!'

I'm stepping out to look for a better job.