Problem Fixer Gifts

'Is the drain still clogged, Henry?'

Boy with his finger in a leaking water bed.

Man bangs on a malfunctioning bathroom mirror to get his reflection to show.

'You have 90 days to fix the problem, or we'll fix it, and mail you the bill!'

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

'I am willing to concede that the company has been underperforming of late...'

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

"See this area right here, honey? This is why we need to find someone who knows what they're doing."

"I take it the toilet is fixed?"

'Incredibly Inexpensive Sound Engineers. Pretty Good Sound Engineers, 12 the price, 23 the quality. You'll hardly notice the occasional feedback.'

"Fido's determined to find that bone."

Delivering red ink to the Berueu of Management and Budget.

Enlightened Cursing

Not all service desk staff were pleased about the new bring your own device policy

"We probably need to rethink our revenue strategy for the practice."

"Dad needs a Phillips screwdriver. Who's Phillip?"

'Dad, perhaps the fan should suck instead of blow?'

'Oh silly me, I'm trying to fix my glasses with nasel spray instead of super-glue!'

"It got so bad that had to bring Jones in to turn things around."

"Post-holiday dieting will be much easier this year. Our disposable cash flow will be diverted."

System failure - calling for sysadmin...

'Let me tell you why I'm here...'

"Get back here and clean out your desk."

Cyber disease.

"It's quite alright searching for the perfect phone. But remember there always will be upgrades."

"Kick the machine"

"We will indeed be facing numerous enraged customers."

'Try rebooting.'

"You've come to the right lawyer. I not only do divorces, I also specialise in bankruptcy proceedings."

'Hello, Biggo Farm Equipment? How much longer is it going to take to get my manure spreader fixed?'

"Have you tried switching it off and switching it back on again - or pretending there's absolutely nothing wrong with it?"

"The problem with our marriage is that we can't afford marriage counselling."

'You've done a fine job throwing money at problems, Senator, but I think it's time to bring in a reliever.'

Leaking washing machine.

"Dad, my doorknob broke...can you fix it?"