Prison Tourism Enthusiast Gifts

"Just get over there and let me get a picture."

"Mr. Caldwell comes to us from a minimum-security correctional facility in Pennsylvania."

'She's promised to wait for me but I only hope her memory isn't what it was!'

Ronnie 'the chameleon' waits for a break in the traffic, before making his break for it...

Sweet Jailbreak

"Carl! I thought I'd find you here."

'That filet mignon was supposed to be your last meal? Whoops-a-daisy!'

"This is Cliff. He's a neo-con."

"No ham in this, I hope?"

Desert Island Inmate

"And just the name alone: 'feral parakeets'... I mean, how cool is that?"

'Oh my lord, they've turned into pillows!'

At his jailbreak, Bob rummaged through grit, sand loam and unfortunately and unintentionally through several dimensions.

"I've rented the extra room to an escaped convict - maybe you know him."

"What's your exit strategy?"

Prisoner on the run - tread mill.

"Sorry, you've got the wrong number."

Prison bus - "Race you for a window seat."

"In the movie about the New York prison escapees, I'd like to see Jack Nicholson as Richard Matt and Woody Harrelson as David Sweat."

Full moon brings out werewolf in prison cell

This gentleman would like to take his bird to see Alcatraz.

'Here comes the warden. Let's see you try to dance your way out of this one.'

'How many times do I have to tell you? First you call a cab, THEN you rob the bank!'

Barnaby in Newgate

Trimming

"I found your contact lens."

'Tell you what - you've really caught the sun to-day.'

"Bob, Bob, he's about to open the flyscreen door! It's our chance to get out of this place!"

Get you anything while I'm out?

Santa visits prison.

Exit vent. Cell block. Climb down bedsheets. Hide behind shrubs. Machine shop. Get tools. Cut fence. Climb tower. View prison up here. Supply room. Crawl through vent. Rope ladder. This escape plan of yours might have worked if it wasn't for the going-away party! Good bye! We'll miss you.

"I think I found the problem...."

'Sure, you can escape, but you never escape unscathed.'

The great escape.

"Bit of a hitch, guys - it may not be viable for me to return to the office just yet."