Visiting Prisons Gifts

"It's like home from home in here. The rules and regulations are very similar."

'Hear that-only here two days and they've made him Category 'A'!'

"I see you haven't forgotten how to play with your balls, honey." "Thanks."

Exhibition for Prisoners

'That filet mignon was supposed to be your last meal? Whoops-a-daisy!'

CCTV on torture cage.

"No ham in this, I hope?"

"When I google myself, the only thing that comes up is my arrest record."

Good News

"Sorry, you've got the wrong number."

This gentleman would like to take his bird to see Alcatraz.

Santa visits prison.

Birdman of Alcatraz.

Man in a Chain Gang has a Peg Leg.

Barnaby in Newgate

'You should have never bragged about taking the little tag off the mattress.'

'Let's stay in tonight.'

Prisoner wallpapering over his tally of days in prison.

'Sorry, but none of our entrees are available for takeout.'

"Just get over there and let me get a picture."

'You're in violation of the dress code, Pendleton!'

We're Not Corrupt. We're Stupid.

'What do you mean, the food is terrific?'

'My wife says I take all the romance out of our conjugal visits.'

'The Warden said you're to stop renting out the security video of your bank robbery.'

The Bird man of Alcatraz celebrates Thanksgiving.

You never take me anywhere.

WARDEN, 'You're a bad influence around here, Murdock!'

''I'm under house arrest for six months. It's a lot more fun if you're not already in jail for a bunch of other crimes.'

Worst escape attempt ever.

'and you promise not to run off, right?'

'If you think he's bad, just wait till they send in the social workers.'

'Can you sentence me to an overcrowded prison that has an overcrowded gang shower?'

'I'm going to handle your appeal, but remember, I'm on death row.'

'Before this arthritis hit me, I was a top-of-the-line pickpocket. Now I can only steal from penny loafers.'