Prison Release Gifts

"She wanted 'warm and fuzzy' so I wrapped her in a mink coat and set it on fire"

After 15 years Mike was released

"Both the movie and I will be released this summer."

'I'm making a note in my diary - you'll be out on the 5th of August 2040.'

'Wilson's back in the work force, and apparently not too humbled by his prison term.'

"Yeah, it's a real tough place to survive, but you'll find out next week when you're released."

"Where do you see yourself in 20 to 25 years?"

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

"This one's called 'Incarceration.'"

Madoff and devil.

Prisoner Crossing

Police Lineup Escape

'She's promised to wait for me but I only hope her memory isn't what it was!'

"Mr. Caldwell comes to us from a minimum-security correctional facility in Pennsylvania."

Exhibition for Prisoners

Exposed and imprisoned.

'My biggest mistake was to make a 'death-bed confession'... then I made a full recovery!'

'Ms. Andrews, have there been any important office memos, voice-mails, texts, tweets or IMs during my incarceration?'

'The food's not too bad here. It tastes just like yours and just like yours, it also comes out of a can.'

Ronnie 'the chameleon' waits for a break in the traffic, before making his break for it...

Sweet Jailbreak

''Willie the Wizard' gets out next week -- get ready to change all the locks.'

Man to lady: 'Prisons are overcrowded, so we're seeing more sentences of timeout instead.'

"Carl! I thought I'd find you here."

'OVERCROWDED-I'll say it's OVERCROWDED!'

'I mistakenly thought that 'mutual' meant the funds were equally mine to use.'

'See, I told you it was a good idea to talk to the plants.'

'Try to think of it as early parole.'

'You're the one who called for a locksmith?'

"The reason I never get any visitors is because all my family and friends are in here!"

Desert Island Inmate

"It's a sort of Birdman of Alcatraz situation, except that Martin here isn't a bird."

"Why not become a prison officer when you're released, Dobson? We need 2,000 new prison officers; the government's keen to provide employment for ex-offenders plus you know the ropes."

'I was a computer executive -- but I performed an illegal operation and was shut down.'

Convict Decor