Prison Ponderer Gifts

The 'Lifer' Pencil

"The jury decided armed robbery was a lifestyle choice."

'That day was pretty bad! That day was awful! That day right there wasn't too bad. That day was okay. Oh, yeah, that day...it was horrible!...'

'It's all very confusing -- they got me for selling military secrets to the Armed Services Committee.'

A confinement of convicts

School boy collecting prison numbers

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Extreme Sisyphus

"What a tragedy... he still had two years of his super left..."

'The economy being what it is, we've had to make a few changes in your retirement plan. . .'

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

"People are looking for stability in pension arrangements..."

"You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!"

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

'Remember that outfit, Miss Wilson, that you said you wouldn't be seen dead wearing?'

"I just learned that my golden parachute was not properly packed."

'Retirement is OK, but instead of looking forword to weekends, I'm working at McDonalds.'

'You got twenty years for hunting without a license? Kind of stiff, isn't it?'

Man In The Stocks Used As A Clock

'When bad 401ks happen to good people'

Passing the Pension Time Bomb

'Just one God? - But won't he be outnumbered?'

Star Trek-the Older Generation. . .

"I'm the ghost of your future retirement."

Jesus wept

"Can you hold on a sec? I just have to condemn this guy to death real quick."

Retirement Issues

'He intentionally entangles his face mask in my hand!'

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

'I re-invested what was left of my 401K into returnable pop cans. I figure by the time I retire I should have about three dollars.'

"The real trick will be enjoying retirement long enough before the Government goes belly up."

Are these sessions as soul-deadening for you as they are for me, doctor? Let's not have a contest, Al. Or, if we do, no wagering.

'Sorry I can't pay your pension until I see gray hair. . . Oh yes, and you also get disability.'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

'Holding! Number 74 on the offense!... Fifteen years to life in prison...'