Prenatal Journey Pillows

'How far along are you?'

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

"Remember, pregnancy is like taking an exciting thrill ride at an amusement park only the seats are larger."

So … you do a lot of yoga?

"I'm so good at this!"

'This is not fair, mom. . . none of my friends is forced to hibernate before December.'

"Bless, Poppy's first tweet!"

Baby in womb chooses from multiple choice pregnancy symptoms...

'You're due in September, however, since you're not mentally ready, let's make it October!'

'He's more supportive after his nap.'

'Hold it!'

Doctor has the taste for patients urine samples.

Biological Alarm Clock.

Birthing Ball

Ultra Sound/Downloading.

Chapter 10: How to extend your stay and throw your father's paternity leave application into chaos.

'When will I start to look 'radiant and blooming'?'

'...And there's the hands - it looks like - well, it looks like he's texting.'

Waiting Room

"Why are you special? Because I'm your mommy, and I'm special."

Obstetrics.

'At this rate nine months is going to take forever.'

"Your baby is fine, but we're keeping her overnight as a precaution. Here's a loaner."

My changing Body: A Guide For New Fathers

"That's my baby brother? Then why'd you eat him?"

Hormones before and after pregnancy.

'I don't get it! Not one of these books gives the same advice TWICE!

'We can't win. Mum keeps telling us to play quietly, and when we do, she thinks we're up to something!'

'I seem to have lost the body I had before I had children.'

young mother with a baby being bombarded by advice on parenting from older mothers

'COME BACK..I NEED TO PUT YOU ON!!'

Today's nervous breakdown occurred yesterday.

Ultrasound. . . AKA: Womb Zoom

'I'm sure this is the right exit .'

"Now we get all our news from Nickelodeon."