Poultry Philosopher Gifts

'What choice do we have? She knows too much.'

'It's because I'm so mysterious. Why did I cross the road? Did I come before the egg? Believe me, the chicks love mysterious men!'

The Rooster Comedian.

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

"I can assure you ladies all our eggs come from free range chickens."

Flea Philosophy.

"Shouldn't there be some sort of pecking order around here?"

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!'

"If you could live your life all over again, what dead animals would you roll in?"

'Tasty bird.'

'I don't think we should have any more eggs Chester. Maybe you should see the vet about having your chicken nuggets removed.'

On Sale Today Free Range Chickens...Back In One Hour.

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

'Let's forget the duck de la margola and order something else!' (man seeing duck fleeing from cook).

Hen Night

'You think irritable fowl syndrome is bad? Just wait until you hit menopause.'

The poultry mania - Cochin China Fowls

Suddenly, the line went dead.

"Nothing to worry about. A nuggetectomy is a very simple procedure."

"I'm being promoted in the company's pecking order."

"I have a sweet pad and thirteen girlfriends. Can't beat a chicken's life."

"Dayum. She bootylicious."

"Let's just agree to disagree." "I suggested that first!"

'Polly want many things, but a cracker isn't among them.'

'Mom said I'd be a late bloomer, but this is ridiculous.'

"And that, son, is where chickens come from."

'Don't worry about retirement Irma: There's more to life than just laying eggs...'

'I think we're starting sex education too early.'

"Don't be alarmed, Lois, but there appears to be a pop-up thermometer protruding from your right buttock."

'You may want to consider diversifying your portfolio.'

'I have to face it Irma, I haven't laid an egg in a week now: I'm menopausal...'

'That's weird, do you smell barbecue sauce, Sarah'

"Just between us, I came first, but I shredded the evidence."