Playful Realist Gifts

'It's very realistic, Katie. It comes equipped with plenty of redtape!'

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

'Hard to follow...'

'It's a zen diaphragm.'

'Let the record show that I suggested primordial souffl'ee.'

'Goodbye, dear. This is the kind of day that makes you feel glad to be alive.'

'There goes another one. Galileo, don't you have any idea what makes them do that?'

"At my age, your legs and bowels begin to go."

Woman talking romantically whilst man talks about measuring the scullery.

Toys from the Pre School of Hard Knocks - Stumbling Blocks.

'How did he make the world in six days?'

"Just how many ways are there to skin a cat?"

"Well, hello there yourself!"

"All right, Thompson. The board concedes that this quarter's economic growth does look very much like a kitty.

Cat Love Ads: "Are you; 'Stubborn, lazy, unfaithful and psychopathic...with no sense of humour?""

The Meaning of Life

A dog and a robot dog

"Alarmingly, after five minutes the pool had come no closer."

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

"First destination: the recycling center to get rid of these cans."

"I guess when you run out of Tooth Fairy teeth, you gotta go get a job!"

Warning Being Alive On This Planet May Cause Cancer

The little engine who could, but decided not to- 'Ah, the heck with it!'

'When I was ready to read, they taught me to tie my shoes - when I was ready to tie my shoes, they taught me to read.'

"Room for bigger presents!"

'I bet he can run twice as fast as you can.' 'But he has twice as many legs!'

The Birth of Philosophical Thought Experiments.

No crawling sign in the desert.

"That was good, but less tongue next time."