Physiotherapy Gifts

'I think my work here is done.'

'Does it hurt when I do this?'

"So, what can I do for you?"

'The new physio's red hot on pre-match stretching.'

'Now Mr Henshaw, let's see if we can't work some of that tension out of your neck.'

'Too tight?'

'There - you can reach for wallet without any trouble at all.'

"Ever heard of the Alexander technique

'Tape it up real tight, Floyd ... and the other ankle too.'

'It's definitely not broken... but you may have pulled a hammy!'

'I'm on the back stretch, about halfway down...I think it's a pulled hamstring.'

'This won't hurt.'

40 minutes in this position

'I want you to touch your toes twenty times a day.' - 'No way, my cap will fall off.'

Basketball injuries.

'Sylvia? It's Allen. Listen, I accidentally left the shop with a knee ligament kit...Yeah, yeah, I know. I am an idiot. Anyway, could you send someone out pronto with the kit for rotator cuffs?'

'Little more work needed on your braking Mr Smith!'

'You're stiff from too much grovelling and I'm afraid it doesn't count as an occupational disease.'

Stretcher Header.

"Jane's a physio, she massages the patients. Paul's from finance, he massages the accounts."

'You're going to have to find a way of avoiding those fast serves.'

Faith-Based Chiropractic Care

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

Licensed Therapist

"I bought it off the therapist who's helping me kick my compulsive shopping disorder."

"Portrait of a Lady"

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

"And as soon as he's on the mend,we'll get the physiotherapist in here with a ball of twine."

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

'I believe we've located the cause of your back problem, Mrs. Kangaroo.'

"Postwar is hell."