Physical Therapy Journey Gifts

'Believe me, I feel your pain. I pulled a muscle bowling one time.'

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

Licensed Therapist

"I bought it off the therapist who's helping me kick my compulsive shopping disorder."

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

"Portrait of a Lady"

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

Spa

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

"Postwar is hell."

"Easy for you to say - you're cured!"

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."

Couples' therapy

"OK, fine. Perhaps 'sower of discord in the lower depths of hell' was overstating it."

"Is that true, Charles? You leave your crap all over the house?"

X-ray Psychology.

"I sometimes think you're the only one who listens to me."

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

'I haven't been able to come to grips with it. My hands are too small.'

"Oops! I just deleted all your files. Can you repeat everything you've ever told me?"

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

"I stand corrected."

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

'I find that a live rhinoceros rather than an invisible elephant speeds things up considerably.'

'I get the feeling you're wagging your tale on the outside and crying on the inside.'

"It's hard not to take a mutiny personally."

'We have three minutes left.'

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

'Why can't they call it a deer, or a squirrel market?'