Philosopher Of The Farm Gifts

Heaven's Cattlegrid.

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

Water Gardening: One thing is certain - you will find the peace and tranquility of water an almost irresistible attraction.

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

''Animal Farm' by George Orwell is definitely my favourite book...'

Agricultural Psychology

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

'She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me...'

The Last Days of a Hydrangea

'When they start calling you a splendid bird, you know you're in trouble.'

It MUST be Valentines Day!

Grass: We lost some good men today!

Man watering with the 'Theory of Natural selection'.

'Aside from a crazed sheep now and then, this is a very risk-free profession.'

"I swear, we spend more time decided which squirrel to bark at than we do actually barking at it."

Dept. de Philosophie

'A little madness in the Spring is wholesome even for the King' -Emily Dickinson.

Stop and Smell the Roses

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

"I've never trusted cows."

"Sometimes, son, the guilt inside builds up so much you have to vent the shame silo."

'I've been experiencing a lot of deja moo.'

'I'm letting it lie fallow this year.'

Poultry Reading: 'Lo, Ye Sky, It Falls! Verily it does, watch ye out!'

'Don't follow my example and become a beast of burden: Study hard at school!'

'These lousy free-range chickens think that they just own the whole world!'

I see Jerry's had a heart attack!

I lactate, therefore I am.

'First of all, I want you to know that my door is always open...'

I wonder if there's life as we know it on other planets.

The Hen Commandments.

'The effects of winter weather on the lambing season has disastrous side effects.'

"Storm’s comin’, Clara. Better get my absentee ballot in."

Learning.