Philosopher In A Pub Gifts

"It's beginning to appear as if I'll never have greatness thrust upon me."

'I had everything going for me, but I could never find the right person to inspire me.'

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

'I trust these equations settle the argument, Professor Lang. It's your round.'

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

"Space is curved and time is relative? Yeah, OK...I'm calling you a cab right now, buddy."

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

Ask not for whom happy hour ends. It ends for thee.

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

Men gossiping

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

"If it's a series of patterned clicks, I'm not here."

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

ONE HORSE TOWN

'Man. Piltdown Man.'

'They're not beer stains. This is actually a 'Rorschach test' patterned shirt.'

"You're going to regret this in the morning."

'My - You've matured, my dear.'

'A quick pint or a quiet drink?'

If bar stools were like playground swings...

'All this talk about a consumer society... I don't buy it.'

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

Brickie's Mate

'Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine... LAST!'

I asked my girlfriend if there was someone else...

Body by Jake

Philosopher's pub with 24 hour thinking.