People Intrigued By The Absurd Gifts

"Oh dear, Ms. Werthington always was afraid she'd die like that."

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

Tourists and their Pets.

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

"He was a sea rescue."

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.

Humans Queue To Use Portable Toilet While Dogs Queue To Use Tree Portable Toilet

'Because the horned one commands them to, that's how!'

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

Monster Clown

'Upon further review, the pig did not have control of the ball prior to being eaten...'

Breakfast surreal.

'Miss Jones, take this down.'

Baseball.

UFO and snowman

'Did anyone hand in a mature stilton last week?'

"Would you describe the pain everyone else causes you as dull and throbbing or sharp like a knife?"

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

Salome on Settle (also called Maitresse d'Orchestre) - intended for book but suppressed

'Bad as this may look, it's actually the perfect accompaniment with your entree.'

Nun fight at the OK Corral.

"'Let's introduce him to a mirror' he said. 'It'll be fun he said'. You call the coroner!"

Minefield! Thank you for treading carefully.

'Ok, now if everyone could just hold still.'

'Nobody special, but rich enough to build this statue of himself.

Magnet at scrapyard

'Never, Ever...believe everything you read.'

A patient, a doctor and a deep sea diver

The Bonvoy Age...

''Tough crowd in tonight!''

The Hypnotato,

A headless man puts up a poster for his lost head.

Albert should have known that cactuses rarely have change. Besides, they prefer jazz.

Cow Pat Planning

River Source