Pearly Gates Pundit Gifts

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

'You certainly lived a remarkable life. Any chance you'll get over yourself?'

St Peter: 'The bike can stay. You, on the other hand, aren't on the list.'

'Eat your lettuce. It'll put colour back in your cheeks.'

Ted enjoyed going to the park and feeding the woodpeckers.

Normal Paisley - Deadly Strain is Introduced.

1880 Presidential Election - Columbia Consoles General Hancock after Election Defeat

Old soldiers never die. They just become TV pundits.

Voice of the GOP

"Of course my main concern is how the situation in Eastern Europe will affect the pennant race."

'Well, I don't know anything about 'identity theft'. All I can tell you, is that according to these records you're already here.'

"These days, professor it's "T.V. punditry or perish.""

Niche Marketing: These Goods are Too Expensive for you to Buy

Uncle Sam opens his fridge upon which is stuck various quotes by famous american politicians from the past.

"I forgot to call in dead."

"I'm afraid we don't accept bribes here, sir."

Steve Spermatozoa, dead at 35 from terminal horniness.

"MBA or not, get a haircut and cover up the tattoos."

"A sizable gratuity always helps."

Thank you, Joe

'Eight hundred million channels and there's still nothing good on!'

'I notice you're claiming non-domicile status, Mr Bull...'

"I'm thinking of buying a peerage with the money from my second job."

"Certainly you're qualified, .… we're just trying to achieve a certain dynamic."

"Unfortunately, a few years back we had to start accepting advertising."

Sean Hannity

"The PM plans to ennobble him."

"The period furniture is authentic. A prime example of colonial cherry."

Mittzkrieg

Pound sign about to be crushed by a 1 Ton Trade weight

"I loved my job. That's gotta count for something."

"You mean that's the Billof Rights? The American Bill of Rights?"