Parents Who Love Humor Pillows

"I don't think Bo Peep was too bothered by foot and mouth...."

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

'We had the baby's ultrasound photo made into wallpaper.'

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

"Your mother and I are feeling overwhelmed, so you'll have to bring yourselves up."

'Your wife has given birth to the blues.'

'Budget cuts have forced us to drop our day-care program. I've contacted your mother to come and pick you up.'

"Instead of taking a bath can I wear a flea collar?"

"Time for bed, guys."

The Wright brothers discover the first nightmare flight

Impracticle Guide to Having Babies

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

'It was romantic before we had kids. Build some stairs.'

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

"Hey, Mom! Check it out! Dad converted his gardo paints to passenger pants!"

'I must be going through a mid-life crisis.'

"What do you think is a good step goal for someone who's just started walking?"

'Well it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

Mom dwarves.

"It makes sense when you see the second painting with the lego."

"Mom, when the baby's born, can I have the bubble wrap it's shipped in?"

"It's from the children. They'd like us to let them in."

"How many times do I have to beep you?"

'His vocabulary is growing by leaps and soap bubbles.'

"If we're lucky, she'll get a single wear out of this."

The inventor of the Slip 'n Slide becomes a father.

"I'm SO lazy, I married a pregnant woman. . . !"

"I have to wear a bike helmet all the time after Mommie heard cars kill more pedestrians than cyclists!"

"Open up for the choo-choo train!"

Ultra Sound/Downloading.

Young Godzilla.

A Mom's Purse

"I'm worried that Ud isn't evolving as quickly as the other kids."

'Now, all I need is a bird.'