Parenthood Journey Gifts

"Why are you special? Because I'm your mommy, and I'm special."

My changing Body: A Guide For New Fathers

'This is not fair, mom. . . none of my friends is forced to hibernate before December.'

"Bless, Poppy's first tweet!"

"Your baby is fine, but we're keeping her overnight as a precaution. Here's a loaner."

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

'He has your nose and my ears.'

'Hi hon! How's the little monster?'

What did I tell you about covering your bottom when you sneeze?

Low-Energy Drinks

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

"Pay more attention to me? I'm sorry, dear, but Mommy needs you to be more specific."

'Congratulations! You've just downloaded a baby boy.'

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."

'Bad luck duck - he's on your side of the bed.'

"Now that I can talk, here's my speaking fee."

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

"Aah! Bless! Look at him on his I-pad!"

'You'll never believe the day I've had...'

"I thought it would be nice if we had a forum where we could get together and have screaming tantrums."

Baby Screen Time

'This is a fine time to leave! What if the doctor delivers the baby while you're out!'

Growth Charts

'We found you in a cabbage!'

"We have the exact same taste."

"It may not look like it to you, but trust me, he's hyperactive. It's exhausting!"

"It's a boy, but that's a common one so don't get too excited."

"I made the mistake of telling him that the world is his canvas."

'What did I learn in school today? You'd better sit down.'

A postwoman delivers mail together with her baby who is riding in the letter carrier.

'It's only 6 AM, but I want to send the kids to Wally's house before his mother sends him over here.'

"Skip the funny voices tonight—O.K., Dad?"