Parental Guidance Gurus Gifts

Kids watching television, "I've just seen a nipple it must be nine o' clock!"

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

'He's the one who needs obedience training!'

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'What's play?'

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

"Is there a vegan option?"

We're looking for someone who knows how to adapt, not adopt.

"That is one absorbent nappy."

"...and I, Pastor Smith...preaching to you now from this pulpit, speak to you from experience about the 'strong-willed' child...BELIEVE me!"

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

"Young man, go to your room and stay there until your cerebral cortex matures."

'Am I looking sad or happy in the appropriate places?'

"Ah...here they are!"

Six-tier Communal Cradle.

"Migration? I love chasing the endless summer, but travelling such distances with kids is exhausting..."

Playing Mozart to the baby.

'Mind how you cross the ocean.'

'You the one who called Amnesty International?'

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

"Instead of taking a bath couldn't I just run through a carwash?"

"Adorable. Is yours a rescue too?"

The modern generation!

"It's difficult to attract a younger customer when our main demographic is babies."

'At midnight, we go over the wall.'

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

"Be afraid to try new things!"

"I'm the last to go home because my parents are still fine tuning their work-life balance."

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

The AdRams Family no.13 - Exams

"This is System One and I am holding the beta for System Two."

'This is Tyler; he's mommy's precious little feral-angel.'