Parental Guidance Gurus Pillows

Kids watching television, "I've just seen a nipple it must be nine o' clock!"

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'What's play?'

'He's the one who needs obedience training!'

Well, we thought we had childproofed the house

'I knew things were getting out of hand when I went from snips, to snails, to puppy dogs tails....'

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

"Now that I can talk, here's my speaking fee."

We're looking for someone who knows how to adapt, not adopt.

"Is there a vegan option?"

"...and I, Pastor Smith...preaching to you now from this pulpit, speak to you from experience about the 'strong-willed' child...BELIEVE me!"

"That is one absorbent nappy."

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

"Young man, go to your room and stay there until your cerebral cortex matures."

'Am I looking sad or happy in the appropriate places?'

"Ah...here they are!"

Six-tier Communal Cradle.

'You the one who called Amnesty International?'

Playing Mozart to the baby.

"Migration? I love chasing the endless summer, but travelling such distances with kids is exhausting..."

'Mind how you cross the ocean.'

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

"Instead of taking a bath couldn't I just run through a carwash?"

"This is System One and I am holding the beta for System Two."

He can't talk yet, but he still gets the last word.

"Adorable. Is yours a rescue too?"

"It's difficult to attract a younger customer when our main demographic is babies."

'This is Tyler; he's mommy's precious little feral-angel.'

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

The AdRams Family no.13 - Exams

"I'm the last to go home because my parents are still fine tuning their work-life balance."

The modern generation!

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

"Be afraid to try new things!"